Are dating apps stuck in a rut? Here’s how they can evolve

Don’t worry, this isn’t another one of those “the future of dating is AI” articles

The world is obsessed with romance and dating. The old saying is “sex sells” but what sells even more than sex is love. According to a recent report from Bumble, over half (52%) of women globally are self-proclaimed romantics who love love. This is no surprise: love is the most transformative and yet the most commodified force in the world. Everyone wants some version of it, right? This definitely feels true as we are continually inundated with dating reality shows, from Love Island to Love is Blind to Ex on the Beach to Married at First Sight.

Despite this, no one appears to be having a good time dating right now. You only have to open TikTok to quickly find a viral video detailing a ridiculous but hilarious dating horror story. From viral content like Who TF Did I Marry?, Dating Wrapped and illustrations of dating disasters, there’s a hunger for stories about dating. Yes, it’s entertaining, but it also shows how widespread these kinds of experiences are.

The dating apps popular today have taken the essence of traditional dating websites, like Plenty of Fish and Match.com, and combined them with sophisticated algorithms and filters. For a while, it was going really well.

According to one survey, 39% of American heterosexual couples reported meeting their partner online in 2017, compared to 22% in 2009. Similarly, the study found 65% of same-sex couples met their partner online. Apps revolutionised dating, giving access to a bigger pool of people than ever before.

However, that popularity is waning. According to Ofcom’s 2024 report, dating app use declined significantly between 2023 and 2024, with a drop of almost 16% in the use of the top 10 most popular dating apps last year.

So, what’s behind this decline?

Concerns about personal safety: In recent years, the dark side of dating apps has been widely documented. From The Tinder Swindler to My Lover, the Killer, people, especially women, have been given a deep awareness of the risks from app interactions. These examples are extreme but smaller acts of harassment, such as unwanted nudes or aggressive messages, are regularly reported by users: more than a third of women under 40 have received unsolicited sexual photos, according to a 2024 YouGov survey. This happens so often that as of 2024 “cyberflashing” is now a criminal offence.

Dating app fatigue: In 2024, Forbes Health reported that 78% of dating app users reportedly feel “emotionally, mentally, or physically exhausted” by them. Most users are active on multiple apps at a time to increase their chances of finding potential connections but, for a lot of daters, this does not yield better results. This often leads to them deleting the apps, only to find themselves back on them again, repeating the same exhausting cycle.

Increasing cost of apps: Many are still free to use but most apps now offer additional subscription plans that profess to provide a better service, such as stronger recommendations, more likes, or the ability to set more dating preferences. Life is now full of an endless offer of subscriptions and yet these additional services still can’t guarantee success, leaving people disillusioned with the whole experience.

User and algorithmic biases: Statistically, Black women and East Asian men are least likely to have success on dating apps. Apryl Williams, author of “Not My Type: Automating Sexual Racism in Online Dating" explained that “Black women are often over-targeted by those seeking exoticism, but a study also found they are classed as the least desired dating demographic”. Dating apps, like many other apps, tend to centre the white experience. Williams says that “in many cases algorithms worsen things. The bias we experience online isn’t different from the bias we experience in other areas of life, it’s just amplified by algorithms. Social apps use techniques like collaborative filtering to guess what a user will like based on what similar users are interested in.”

Bias isn’t just racial: plus size women have been vocal about their difficult experiences on apps. Plus-size author and blogger Stephanie Yeboah talked about going dates with a man she met on Bumble, who eventually ghosted her. “His friend tells me that in the interests of full transparency, he thought he should let me know that the reason I had not heard from Robert since our second date was because he had been dared to 'pull a fat chick' and – upon completing the dare – had won a sum of money his friends had pooled.” These experiences are driving people who fit outside of Eurocentric beauty standards away from using dating apps.

Hunger for IRL connection: Higher levels of post-pandemic loneliness, alongside an increased need for third spaces, have contributed to deeper desires for real-life connection in order to foster more meaningful connections. We see this through people participating in more group activities like run clubs, supper clubs and book clubs to meet people with similar interests. Nearly half (46%) of singles feel that unique and quirky interests are now a key attribute to attractiveness (Bumble, 2025). Some app creators are realising this: last year, dating app Thursday shared its renewed focus on creating IRL events.

Younger daters: the romanticisation of having a “meet-cute”, like bumping into the love of your life at a coffee shop feels more heartwarming than swiping through a dating app. Coupled with a growing fear of rejection and safety concerns, dating apps feel less appealing to younger daters.

This doesn’t necessarily mean the end of dating apps. There is still a big demand for them, but in order to ensure safer user experiences, something has to change.

So, if I were the owner of a popular dating app brand, here’s what I’d be considering:

Be more inclusive: apps should be considering more sexual orientations and relationship styles. People are now more fluid in their sexuality and open to more than just monogamy. Yes, there are apps such as HER, Feeld and Pure that cater to specific groups, but for those big dating apps that are supposed to cater to everyone, how can they make themselves more open?

Recognising the experiences shared by marginalised groups and plus size women, brands should be thinking about how they can foster a more positive app experience for these groups.

Foster more IRL connections: More people, particularly younger daters, want to connect in person. This is something that some dating apps and event organisers are taking on board.

More awareness of different life stages: Everyone wants some version of love. Dating apps shouldn’t just be focusing their marketing on representing young daters. There is a wealth of older people - from empty nesters to single parents to widows – looking for love. how can you include a greater range of people on your apps?

Better safety: People, especially more vulnerable users, are scared. How can dating apps ensure a safer app experience for users?

It’s time for apps to step up. Address these issues and dating apps can secure their future - and help countless romantics find love.